It is with great pleasure I see it's still against the law to call for the Queen to be overthrown.
Tempt me, baby!
Overthrow the Queen!
Queen Elizabeth II, that is, in case there's any confusion, and I speak as a born & bred Englishman, so I'm quite sure this law will apply to me:
The Treason Felony Act (UK) 1848 reads:
If any person whatsoever shall, within the United Kingdom or without, compass, imagine, invent, devise, or intend to deprive or depose our Most Gracious Lady the Queen, from the style, honour, or royal name of the imperial crown of the United Kingdom, or of any other of her Majesty's dominions and countries, or to levy war against her Majesty, within any part of the United Kingdom, in order by force or constraint to compel her to change her measures or counsels, or in order to put any force or constraint upon or in order to intimidate or overawe both Houses or either House of Parliament, or to move or stir any foreigner or stranger with force to invade the United Kingdom or any other of her Majesty's dominions or countries under the obeisance of her Majesty, and such compassings, imaginations, inventions, devices, or intentions, or any of them, shall express, utter, or declare, by publishing any printing or writing ... or by any overt act or deed, every person so offending shall be guilty of felony, and being convicted thereof shall be liable ... to be transported beyond the seas for the term of his or her natural life.
Well, I suppose they could argue that I've been pre-transported, but the fact remains that I am breaking that law, and it is something I firmly believe - that the British Monarchy is an anachronistic load of crap and the Royal Family should be deposed forthwith. Overthrow them! By force if necessary, although I think that only Harry might put up a fight worth the name, so it won't be much of a challenge.
The Queen and her retinue are actually the world's richest beneficiaries, with their lives and castles paid for by the state, at the very same time that poverty in Britain has reached a post-WWII high.
From Young Harry bonking cougars in Las Vegas on the taxpayer, to Princess Michael of Kent's absurd statement that she is suffering from "austerity", to the mind-bogglingly stupid heir to the throne, Charles, and his support of homeopathy and blatant attempts to interfere with Britain's political processes the entire extended royal family is a total waste of time & money and should have been retired many years ago. Lizzie herself is such a revolting old hag that she honestly gets her grandson's wife to curtsey to her blood grandchildren!
This is one of the reasons we know that William's wife Kate is such a nebbish - and as has already been noted by several commentators, is no more than a broodmare with no brains. Having seen the example of Diana, I imagine old Dizzy Lizzy herself made extremely sure that Kate is just smart enough to realise which side her bread is buttered on, but not smart enough to think independently. I expect Wills has been told in no uncertain terms that if he's going to go the traditional male royal route and indulge in a few quiet roots on the side that he must: A) make bloody sure Kate doesn't find out - unlike Charles & Camilla, and B) not screw in his own circle - taking a line from his granddad, Philip, who always used very high-quality, very highly-discreet, stunning-looking hookers.
Check it out - all the way through the Royal Family's 1000-year history, the males have spread their seed around like a farmer spreading shit. Bastards abound, and let's not forget Henry VIII, who simply executed his wives once they'd past their use-by date.
Useless bludgers, to a child. I've seen people applauding William for actually holding his baby. WTF? Most fathers do, these days.
Let me put this even more plainly than I have above: all royal families and monarchs are an insult to humankind.
We are in the goddamned 21st century, not the 14th! We don't have the feudal system any more, and we certainly have no need of hereditary rulers of any kind.
Certainly, the more benign, bludger-like queens like England's, Holland's and Denmark's are mostly harmless in legislative terms, but they are still useless reminders of a bygone age. Their properties should be turned into museums, and the royal families employed as workers in them.
Much worse than that kind of king or queen are are a number of monarchs around the world who are actually despotic family oligarchs. The King of Thailand, old "bummy bowl" is one, and despite the corruption that surrounds him, he is dwarfed in infamy by the Saudi "royal" family. As far as royalty goes, they have behaved royally, killing all other contemporary claimants in a series of early 20th century bloodbaths. It's why I like to pronounce the House of Saud as "the house of sword".
Kim Jung Un-uncle and Un-ex-girlfriend is merely the latest member of a family that is royal in everything but name. Family succession is assured, and rule is absolute.
Let's just kick them all out.
Copyright © Alan Charman